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The Modern Sex-pest

I keep hearing from gay men my age (yes, I’m old enough to be referred to as “daddy”) and a lot younger guys about a current plague of guys on line I’m calling the ‘Modern Sex-pest’.
 
Let’s get something straight, there is nothing attractive, flattering or even sexy about contacting someone you don’t know and within the first few lines of communication asking for a cock pic. It’s actually ugly... not the cock pic, the attitude.
 
Like here is an example, a guy messages me on Facebook Messenger (Could be Instagram/ Snapchat/ WhatsApp, any form of social media). Don’t know him, we have no mutual friends, no idea how they even found me when my profile is private. Conversation starts nice enough, “Hello, how are you and good morning”. It’s early so I say “I’m just waking up, how are you?” I get a thumbs up “I’m good thanks. Can I see you wanking?”
 
Wow – that’s forward.
 
I look in his profile and just like that old saying “People who talk the most have the least to say”, these days it seems to be the “People who are the most forward have the least to show”. The profile is limited, only thing on the timeline is shared from other people, not giving anything of himself except a filtered profile pic with “beauty face app” set to FULL.
 
Now, I’m a sexual being and in the past I had no problem sharing pics or vids of myself cause it was fun and exciting, but the key word here is “sharing”, and that’s the difference, there is a change happening where these type of people don’t want to share, instead they talk to you like it’s a job interview, they ask all the questions and reveal nothing about themselves, except maybe to find a few common interests with you and that’s only to gain your trust and think you have a ‘friend’ on line.
 
So you send a photo, and you wait for a return photo, and you wait, and you ask, and they come back with “man, you look so great” or “that’s so big” or something to that nature and they ask for another photo – guess what, that’s your cue for “they aren’t sending anything”. Stop all communication, block them even. They will call you rude and make it seem like they were only having fun and try and weasel their way back in. They are wasting your time and playing with you in a way that’s not going to result in an orgasm.
 
And those apps like Grindr, Scruff, Tindr, they are great, love them, they have a genuine purpose; however they also can allow a certain type of person a platform to manipulate you into meeting with them and they have either used another person’s pics on their profile, or put up a front of being someone they are not. The classic line of “I go to the gym” does not count if you are only walking past it on your way to Hungry Jacks.
 
If you decide to meet up with someone, and I’ve had to say this to my niece so it’s not just a gay issue, and they are not who you thought they were cause of a pic that was decades old or not even them, you have every right to turn around and leave, don’t even entertain the idea of a ‘mercy’ fuck. Same as if you meet them and within 5 seconds they are trying to rip your clothes off and have sex with you. If you haven’t given the ok for this and they are making you feel extremely uncomfortable, get up and get out. I’m sure when you arranged to meet it may have been just a hook up or to get to know them, however when it’s not a mutual and not working for you a sex pest like that is verging on rape.
 
I had one guy turn up to my place years ago and I said to his face “They are not your pics, you’re a liar” and I shut the door in his face and he said “I used those pics cause I knew you wouldn’t fuck me if I used my real pics, and you’re so rude for shutting the door in my face” – no mate, you are a liar, and what is rude is you assuming I’d be so horny I wouldn’t care what you looked like. Trust me, I was horny, but pretending to be someone you are not is a massive turn off.
 
What’s the point of writing this? Hmmm, good question, gets it off my hairy chest for one, and I wanted it to be a reminder out there for anyone reading this that’s had similar experiences to know that there is nothing wrong with you at all, stand your ground, don’t give in to the insistent pressure of someone online or in person that you don’t know trying to get naked photos/ cock pics/ sex from you. They are not being flattering, they are not sincere, they certainly won’t travel half way across the world to be with you cause “OMG you’re so hot
 
It’s all a game I know, and some people score and win big meeting someone for either just great sex or finding love, however let’s play it all a bit smarter and give these people spoiling it for everyone exactly what they deserve – nothing!
 
Have a bit of dignity and self-respect, something none of these types of modern sex-pests have.
 
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Urgent Call For Action On Same Sex Marriage

  • Published in Latest

Australian Marriage Equality (AME) has issued an urgent call to supporters of marriage equality to contact delegates to this week’s ALP National Conference.

AME spokesperson Alex Greenwich said far-right Christian groups are conducting a concerted delegate lobbying campaign that may see marriage equality knocked off the Conference agenda.

“Unless LGBT people and our families and supporters raise their voices now, opponents of equality may succeed in sidelining marriage equality at this week’s conference,” Greenwich said.

“We urge everyone to email or call conference delegates asking them to support marriage equality.

“To help, AME has compiled the following list of conference delegates with their contacts, as well as key points to make.”

In today’s Australian newspaper, Australian Christian Lobby spokesman Jim Wallace said “minority lifestyles should be respected but cannot be expected to dictate society norms as this 2per cent or less of the population seems intent on doing”.

His comments come as the ACL and other anti-gay groups like Salt Shakers mobilise their members to lobby against any debate about same-sex marriage at the ALP National Conference.

Five points you should make in your phone call or email:

1. I am one of the 60% of Australians who support same-sex marriage. Its 64% support when you look at just Labor voters (Galaxy poll, June 2009)
2. Discrimination in marriage is inconsistent with the ALP’s stated opposition to discrimination and its principle of not pandering to prejudice (ALP National Platform, 2009)
3. Marriage in Australia is a civil institution, not a religious one (fmr Family Court Chief Justice, Alastair Nicholson) 
4. Civil unions are not an adequate substitute for same-sex marriage
5. For all these reasons, the ALP needs to take action regarding discrimination in Australias marriage laws. At a minimum the National Conference should debate marriage equality.

Anti-gay groups are very successful at mobilising large numbers of people at the last minute to thwart open and public discussion about equality issues like marriage. Supporters of marriage equality should make a phone call or send an email before 5pm on Wednesday 29 July.

Making a call is very easy. Simply tell the person who answers that you are calling to register your support for marriage equality with <person’s name>. Try to mention the five reasons above. The person may ask you for your contact details, which you can choose to give or not to give as you wish.

Sending an email is also easy. Either copy the individual email address below, or copy the “email all” list to send a copy of your email to all the identified ALP conference delegates at once. Copy the five points into your email and include a personal message about why you think it’s important for the ALP to debate equal marriage at its National Conference.


Email All List - copy this list of emails and send one to them all.
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You need JavaScript enabled to view it..nsw.gov.au, greg.donnelly@parliament.nsw.gov.au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.w.gov.au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..gov.au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..nsw.gov.au, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., This email address is being protected from spambots. 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Contact Individually
Anna Bligh
This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.v.au
07 3224 4500

Kevin Rudd Federal Labor Leader, Prime Minister
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(02) 6277 7700

Julia Gillard Deputy Labor Leader, Deputy Prime Minister
This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..au
(02) 6277 7320

Chris Evans Government Leader in the Senate
This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
1300 655 388 (WA only)

Stephen Conroy Deputy Government Leader in the Senate
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1300 131 546 (VIC only)

ACT Jon Stanhope Chief Minister
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Kimberley Fischer
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John Hargreaves
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Kim Sattler
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Nathan Rees NSW Premier
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Paul Lynch
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Robert McClelland
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(02) 9585 9100

Greg McLean
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Paul McLeay
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Belinda Neal
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(02) 4322 1922

Christine Robertson
Christine.Robertson@parliament.nsw.gov.au

Eric Roozendaal
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Michelle Rowland
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Ursula Stephens
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1300 301 987 (NSW only)

Anthony Albanese
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(02) 9564 3588

Mark Arbib
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(02) 9251 3766

Chris Bowen
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(02) 9726 4100

David Bradbury
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(02) 4732 1801

Tony Burke
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(02) 9553 3800

Linda Burney
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Chris Christodoulou
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Jason Clare
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(02) 9790 2466

Sharon Claydon
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Russ Collison
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Paddy Crumlin
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John Della Bosca
This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..nsw.gov.au

Greg Donnelly
greg.donnelly@parliament.nsw.gov.au

Justine Elliot
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(07) 5523 4371

John Faulkner
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1300 301 752 (NSW only)

Amanda Fazio
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Joel Fitzgibbon
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(02) 4991 1022

Michael Forshaw
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1300 301 781 (NSW only)

Noreen Hay
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Kristina Keneally
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Trish Crossin
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1300 301 713 (NT only)

Anna Bligh QLD Premier
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Bill Ludwig
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Charis Mullen
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Wayne Swan
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Mike Rann Premier
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Karen Atherton
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Lyn Breuer
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Mark Butler
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John Camillo
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Nick Champion
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Kate Ellis
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Don Farrell
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David Bartlett Tas Premier
david.bartlett@education.tas.gov.au
03 6233 3464

Kevin Bracken
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Danielle Green
danielle.green@parliament.vic.gov.au 
03 9432 9782

Catherine King
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(03) 5338 8123

Jenny Macklin
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(03) 9459 1411

Dave Noonan
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A big thankyou to the heads up on this topic from our friends at Sydney Star Observer and Southern Star (great GLBTI community newspapers!)

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